Dating hiatus… FINITO!
I’m a few days early, but I’m done with being single. I love the stress-free/carefree lifestyle it offers me… However, I’m now cuddle deprived, and wanting to settle down with someone truly special.
Gone are the days that I date men who are only after a booty call. Really — Guys, have some respect. I can get that if I want it, but ya know, it’s empty and unfulfilling. I want more! It’s now time for me to focus on being very specific about who I’m dating, rather than going out willy-nilly with any guy that asks because ‘maybe he’ll have more depth in person’. That’s why I haven’t been very happy with my dating life up to this point, generally speaking. I simply haven’t been selective enough.
So, I have a multi-pronged approach to finding a guy worthy of a relationship. In no specific order, I’ve added my profile on the relationship section only of Lavalife, I’m headed to a couple of speed dating events next month, I’m going to check out Campoverde (a singles/networking club in Vancouver that had a really friendly atmosphere the last time I visited) with a couple of single friends, I’m working on organizing a ‘Singles Party’, and I’m off to go skate skiing at least twice a week for the next couple of months at Cypress (Have you seen the men in those tight ski pants?? Yum! LOL!)
I’m off to my first date tonight. He seems very down-to-earth, fun-loving, and respectful. He’s also decent looking, which is a plus! I’ll keep ya posted…
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“I can get that if I want it, but ya know, it’s empty and unfulfilling.”
It really shouldn’t, but this kind of thing still gets to me: it’s hard to read about people who can have a booty call/one-night-stand whenever they want to, when even recognizing that I’m in a position to get a girl’s phone number (much less actually get her phone number much less actually call her much less get a hold of her and not her answering machine) feels difficult. Empty and unfulfilling as they may be, it would still constitute a major improvement over my current situation.
We’ve talked about this in person, so I don’t want this to come across as “I keep saying this, but”. I’m just saying that for those who weren’t privy to the conversation, actively declaring that you will resist the urge to date for a month as well as the “I can get it whenever I want” is a little hard to swallow for those who want to quit *not* dating.
Tanya, forget Lavalife and those other dating deals, You should put yourself up on the Dating Show as seen on The LIfe Network so we can all see you in action. I hear they even give you money and pay for your dating needs?
Or, The Real Canadain Chick, rather than Idol….
Just a thought?
[[[Me, no... I'm not a spammer...[X]]]]
We’re all waiting to see how it went!
I don’t believe you were rubbing it in. I don’t believe anybody who says, as an aside (and that what it was) that it’s either easy for them to get a date or hard for them not to date. I think they honestly believe that and it comes across as arrogant to those who have a hard time. The key words are “comes across”, and not “arrogant”: I know you’re not arrogant (you seem arrogance-free in real life), it’s just a gut reaction.
Secretly (or not-so-secretly anymore) I admire people who are successful with dating, as well as the talkative people in my circle. This past year I’ve made an effort to be around these people more, because when I stopped listening to myself and listened to what they were saying, they really seem like interesting people.
Also, I believe you when you say you’re more interested in a guy who’s shy but doesn’t try to hide it when making an approach. You’re also not alone in thinking that: http://volatile.org/old/before/20000220.html
Also, I have this mental list of things I’m tired of, and Not Dating is one of them. It’s a simple shift in attitude, really: Not Dating has become hard work that pays shit, so I think I’m going to just quit and find something, y’know, better.
Mehh.. Its all so frustrating isn’t it? You are happy when someone finally find someone… but then, you quickly compare it to your own life… and think…. Dammmmmn.
Ive stopped online dating permanently. Its not good for men…. wayy WAYYY too frustrating. Nightclubs arent good… but, I have very positive things to say for Salsa!
*Gosh* …That came out wrong, I guess, Richard. I didn’t write it to sound like I was rubbing it in to someone who isn’t doing the booty call thing. In fact, I GREATLY respect a guy who doesn’t.
As much as confidence and an outgoing personality is attractive to me, so is a balanced shy-side. I’d *much* rather have a guy be nervous about asking me out than be asked out by a player, or someone looking to ‘fill some time’.
My apologies if it came out wrong…
Good Luck with your first date!
ps: I was only 2 days shy of making it a whole month — And, if we’re talking symantics, I haven’t met anyone new in well over a month. …It was a welcome break, but I’m ready to move ahead with finding someone special now.
I’ve been single for about 5 months, and even at that point it was a brief glance backward with someone. All-in-all, I’ve pretty much been single since the middle of April. It’s time for me to get focused on finding someone truly amazing.