The Singles Series: Chapter 1

Over the next little while, I’m going to post a Coles Notes version of several books I’m reading on singlehood, because I think all of us single people could use a little help, and some positive reinforcement. I’ll keep these overviews short, and to one particular topic — And I’d love to engage everyone, even the ‘taken’ ones in some discussion on these topics, so please pipe up and let me know if you agree or disagree with what I’ve learned so far, and why. If you have something to add to the topic, comment away!

So, here’s the first topic in the series: (This is probably the most obvious of the topics, yet is easily the most forgotten in day to day life.)

Getting ready for Mr/Ms. Right, both physically and mentally…
We’ve all heard this before, but somehow it gets lost in the details… You never have a second chance to make a first impression. Many of us take a fair amount of time, or at least put a decent amount of thought into getting ready for a first date. That’s great, except, by the time you are on a first date, you’ve likely already made the first impression. Assuming you find potential dates in person (rather than just by online means, which is a whole other type of first impression but not one to be disregarded), that person has already had you burned into their minds and their first impression is set. This first impression, from what I understand, is critical for the future of any sort of possible relationship. It’s important to be aware of this, and not lose the opportunity to make a great first impression before you meet your next date. Be aware of how you present yourself to others — Groom appropriately to the activity you are doing, but take some extra care.

This is equally true for your psychological state as well. Keep your mental doors open for love to walk in; Potential partners don’t simply enter your life in singles clubs, parties and through online dating sites. Keep your eyes open for possibilites all the time — The morning coffee routine, the dentist’s office, the cute guy/girl in the office next door that you meet in the elevator every day. Your facial expressions, and your mindset can make or break any potential for a possible date. Give them the opportunity to notice you — Smile, or better yet, start a conversation. Take a little risk — You certainly don’t have anything to lose: There’s nothing lost if you don’t get the reaction you were hoping for if you didn’t have any interaction in the first place — In fact, you only gain from this risk (which isn’t really risk if you can’t lose) — If nothing else, you gain confidence for the next encounter. Practice makes perfect (Or, at least, better!)